"Rise and shine, Mr. Freeman. Rise and shine. Not that I wish to imply you have been sleeping on the job. No-one is more deserving of a rest. And all the effort in the world would have gone to waste until... well, let's just say your hour has come again. The right man in the wrong place can make all the difference in the world. So, wake up, Mr. Freeman. Wake up and smell the ashes." - G-Man in Half-Life 2
Affro Japan Level Design Final Fantasy

How to speak n00b - Episode 07: N00b is contagious

Oh, thank goodness. Our study has hit a major setback. We have finally returned from a harrowing ordeal. Many researchers were lost to bring you this information.

As part of our study, we decided to track the movements and behavior of the newb as it might relate to the n00b species.

It is a common misconception that n00bs and newbs are members of the same species. This is not true. They do share many similar traits, but the newb species is non-hostile and usually well tempered.

Newbs will often have similar plumage to the n00b. Their equipment may not be level or job appropriate and their subjob may not reflect their role in society. This, however, is simply based on inexperience due to young age. Newbs will mature naturally into normal players given time and proper guidance.

Unfortunately, newbs can contract n00bism if they come into contact with a n00b during their development.

Our research team was attempting to infiltrate a group of newbs when a horrible discovery was made: a n00b was hiding amongst their number. He quickly went about his work spreading misinformation and ideas.


The n00bism quickly spread through the newbs until they mutated. It was horrendous. WTFs and OMGs flew madly through the air and many of my people were caught in the tide.

A group of five unsuspecting and quite normal newbs had been transformed into grammarless monsters. Numbers took the place of letters! It was pure madness! WHMs were pulling, WARs stopped voking.

We barely escaped with our lives.

Updated 2008-09-27 20:25:05